Pleasure & Procrastination: How personality shapes our struggles with time

In a quiet corner of the city, a small business owner sits surrounded by notebooks, tabs open across three monitors, and a half-drunk cup of coffee. She’s knee-deep in a new idea: a brilliant twist on a customer onboarding journey that just might save her team hours of future effort.

She hasn’t yet invoiced her last three clients, followed up on supplier delays, or reviewed this month’s budget. But this new thing, this shiny idea, feels right. More than right: it feels good. Energising. Important. Necessary.

Except it isn’t. Not today, at least. It’s productive avoidance – procrastination disguised as purposeful work – and it feels good.

Welcome to the strange psychology of time management, where personality traits, social tendencies and internal rewards can lead us to make consistently inefficient choices, even while convincing ourselves they’re wise ones.

This article explores why we say yes when we mean no, why we chase ideas over execution, and why understanding our own psychology may be the key to reclaiming our time.

Why do agreeing and procrastination feel good?

When we think about procrastination, we might naturally think about avoiding doing something. That to-do list doesn’t appeal; I can put it off until next week; I’m not in the mood. We know what we should be doing and are choosing not to do it.

But there is another type of procrastination. It’s a variety where the activity we’re (usually unconsciously) choosing to do instead makes rational sense and feels rewarding.

Why is this? Well, it’s all about calories, energy and your personality.

Our brains comprise only 2% of our body weight but use 25% of the calories we consume. Conscious cognition takes effort. It’s why you feel exhausted after a day of active listening, problem-solving and other energy-intensive tasks.

But we evolved in a time of scarcity and have remained unchanged since. We’re wired for a calorie-deficient, hand-to-mouth, life-on-the-savannah existence. When we process information and stimuli in line with this energy-efficient wiring, we’re rewarded. When we don’t, we’re exhausted.

That wiring is unique to each of us – and personality is part of our default operating system.

When we think of personality, we’re usually referring to behaviour – and many personality assessments categorise people based on observed behaviour. But behaviour is not always the result of personality. It can be shaped by social norms, learned approaches, developed skills, conscious decisions, coping mechanisms, biases, and a range of other influences.

There may be occasions where some of these behaviours fall into common patterns: some people might prefer evidence and planning before starting a project, while others may prioritise emotional responses or group dynamics. But these can result from choice and experience, not innate personality.

For example, someone might naturally thrive in unstructured settings (low Conscientiousness). However, if they don’t plan or prepare, they may struggle to run a business or manage family logistics. Over time, they learn to display behaviours that don’t reflect their underlying personality.

We are each far more rich and complex than primary colours or clusters of letters and labels can explain. Personality isn’t about reds and blues. Nor is it about being simply introverted or extraverted. It’s about our unique, nuanced differences.

As a result, we each have different strengths and derailers: when we’re at our best, and what might get in our way if we’re unaware of their influence.

Psychologists describe this using the Five Factor Model of Personality (also known as the Big Five or OCEAN): Openness to Experience, Conscientiousness, Extraversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism.

Agreeableness and the fear of no

In the Big Five personality model, Agreeableness describes a tendency towards cooperation, empathy, and social harmony. It’s an indicator of how people become part of our in-group.

Highly agreeable individuals tend to be warm, considerate, and motivated to avoid conflict. They are collaborators and consensus-builders, who consider others’ needs and are more likely to accept people into their in-group. These are the team players, the people who pick up others’ slack, the ones you can count on – until their calendar collapses under the weight of too many yeses.

When we follow approaches aligned with our innate personality psychology, we are rewarded with happy hormones: oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine and endorphins. For high-agreeables, acting altruistically and in the service of the tribe feels good.

The desire to please is also socially rewarded. When you say yes to a colleague’s request or take on an extra project for a client, it activates a social feedback loop: gratitude, praise, belonging. But it often comes at a cost to your priorities.

Research into Agreeableness has shown that those high in this trait often experience greater interpersonal satisfaction (i.e. they feel connected and happier within the group), but are more likely to internalise stress (Graziano & Eisenberg, 1997). This stress doesn’t always show up in public. Instead, it bubbles under the surface: delayed frustration, passive-aggressive communication, or internalised resentment. Cue the imaginary arguments you have in the shower after agreeing to something you never wanted to do.

Saying yes might preserve a relationship. But when it becomes habitual, it also erodes time. Worse, it removes space for deeper, more strategic work that sustains long-term business and personal health. The psychological toll isn’t just burnout; it’s the dissonance of living out someone else’s priorities instead of your own.

The joy of openness, creativity, and productive procrastination

Agreeableness isn’t the only personality factor that influences our productivity. Openness to Experience is the trait most associated with imagination, creativity, intellectual curiosity, and the desire for novelty.

Entrepreneurs and solo professionals often score high in this domain; it fuels innovation, experimentation, and the willingness to try unconventional approaches. But it also has a shadow.

Highly open individuals are more likely to experience spontaneous interest in new topics and derive intrinsic satisfaction from learning or inventing (McCrae & Costa, 1997). This can lead to what psychologists call flow – a state of deep engagement where time disappears. It feels rewarding because it is: dopamine, the brain’s reward neurotransmitter, reinforces novelty-seeking and idea generation (Ashby, Isen & Turken, 1999).

But flow in the wrong task becomes a cul-de-sac: an enjoyable detour that never quite loops back to what needed doing.

This is productive procrastination. It mimics work, sometimes spectacularly so. You might be designing a brilliant new system or perfecting a colour-coded content calendar. But if it isn’t the right task at the right time, it’s still avoidance. It just feels good enough to rationalise: “If I could just develop this new widget, then the business would be better.”

This is the crux of what makes time mismanagement so insidious: we’re often not wasting time, we’re investing it in things that feel good and even look justifiable but aren’t actually moving the needle.

Where is Conscientiousness when you need it?

If Openness is the engine of exploration, Conscientiousness is the rudder of execution. This trait is characterised by self-discipline, orderliness, and a goal-oriented mindset. In research, it is consistently the strongest personality predictor of job performance across industries (Barrick & Mount, 1991).

Those low in Conscientiousness (like me) may be full of ideas but struggle to bring them to completion. They are at their best when they can be flexible, unstructured and adaptable. When the deadline is imminent, they become a flurry of production and thrive in that crisis – even when it might have been caused by their own lack of planning. There’s no faster housecleaner than a low-Conscientiousness person with an unexpected guest on the way.

High Openness combined with low Conscientiousness is a common profile among creatives and entrepreneurs (again, like me) and is a pairing that drives innovation but struggles with structure.

The result is often an ongoing battle between the joy of ideation and the grind of implementation. When motivation wanes (as it always does), those with lower Conscientiousness find it harder to follow through or leave things until the last possible moment. Their to-do list becomes aspirational rather than operational. They may over-rely on mood to determine action, and since novelty is mood-enhancing, it tends to win.

Each trait brings its own time traps. For some it’s saying yes too often or needing last-minute urgency to act. For others, it might be through over-cautiousness and a need for data or a desire to excessively discuss the matter to find a consensus that isn’t required.

Time, emotion, and the myth of Future You

Productive procrastination feels positive – and even enjoyable – and we can rationalise it away easily. To others, it still looks like procrastination. It still looks like time-wasting.

Procrastination isn’t just a time issue; it’s an emotional regulation issue. Research by Sirois & Pychyl (2013) shows that procrastination arises when we prioritise mood repair over long-term outcomes. That is, we avoid a task not because we’re lazy or disorganised, but because it evokes negative emotions: boredom, anxiety, inadequacy.

This explains why even high-performing individuals procrastinate. The behaviour isn’t irrational if you consider the emotional landscape. Faced with something hard or uncertain, your brain offers you an alternative that feels better – often something that still looks like work.

Future You becomes a convenient scapegoat. We offload responsibility to a hypothetical version of ourselves who will magically have more time, more discipline, and fewer meetings. The problem, of course, is that Future You is made of the same psychological wiring as Present You.

In addition to our internal traits, we’re also navigating powerful social scripts. For business owners and professionals, these often include being available, helpful, responsive, and appearing busy and productive.

These scripts are rarely questioned, but they shape what we say yes to. They lead us to fill our diaries with client calls, emails, networking events, and back-to-back meetings – not because it’s the best use of time, but because it conforms to a social ideal of what a successful professional looks like.

Comparison worsens this. When we see others constantly posting wins or working late, we mirror those behaviours. Our calendars begin to reflect not our values, but our insecurities.

Our personalities amplify this, too. If we consider only Agreeableness, high-agreeables might fear being disliked or excluded, while low-agreeables may worry their goals aren’t ambitious enough or that they need to push themselves (and others) harder. Their rationale makes sense to them – but may look irrational to observers.

This is why time management advice that focuses only on tools (like calendars or to-do lists) often fails. The issue isn’t capability, but the complex psychology of identity, emotion, and social belonging.

A time strategy for your personality

The solution starts with self-awareness, not more hacks. When you understand your traits, you can create time strategies that work with your psychology, rather than against it.

If you score high in Agreeableness:

• Practise polite refusal. Scripts like “I’d love to help, but I’m at capacity” can preserve relationships while protecting your time.
• Block non-negotiable solo time in your calendar and treat it like a meeting with someone important. Because it is.
• Recognise that you can adopt low-Agreeableness behaviours (like saying no or holding boundaries), but they will require more cognitive energy. Plan time to recharge afterward.

If you’re high in Openness and low in Conscientiousness:

• Use novelty to your advantage. Turn boring tasks into creative challenges (e.g. race the clock or add a playful constraint).
• Schedule a “creativity window” after core tasks are done to contain exploration.

Other strategies include:

• Building your day around your energy patterns. Prioritise deep work in the morning when willpower is strongest. Avoid scheduling it after poor sleep or while hungry.
• Using precommitment strategies: public accountability, timed sprints, or focus apps that remove digital distraction. You’re not weak; you’re human.
• Most importantly, redefine productivity. The goal isn’t doing more, but doing the right things at the right time, in a way that aligns with your values and personality.

This applies across the personality spectrum in the Five Factor model.

The dimension of Extraversion, for example, includes the facet of Activity. High-Activity individuals are energetic, fast-paced, and thrive on constant motion. But someone can be Extraverted and still be low-Activity.

I fall into that camp. I don’t naturally gesticulate as I talk or energise others with my tempo. As a public speaker, I practise more energetic delivery because I know it resonates – but it drains me. So I always block time afterward for a walk, music, or something restorative. Without it, I risk overextension and stress responses.

There is no one-size-fits-all. We are each unique.

Understanding ourselves – when we’re at our best, and how we might derail through productive procrastination, over-agreeing, or other tendencies – is the key to development.

And it all starts with self-awareness. Because our default psychology won’t tell us when we’re derailing; it makes rational sense to us at the time.

Final thoughts

Time is not just a resource; it’s an emotional mirror. The way we use it reflects our personality, fears, needs and desires.

If you find yourself constantly overwhelmed, distracted or saying yes too often, it doesn’t mean you’re bad at time management. It means your psychology is working exactly as it was designed to.

So back to our business owner, surrounded by tabs and to-do lists and fuelled by caffeine and dopamine: she isn’t broken. She’s brilliant. But she’s also human. Her brain is doing what it does best – making her feel good, protecting her energy, and pursuing the ideas that excite her.

Reclaiming your time isn’t just about better systems or discipline. Sometimes, it’s about noticing when pleasing others or chasing pleasure is costing you the priorities that matter most.

When we stop trying to fix ourselves with ever-tighter schedules and instead understand the deep currents of our personality, we create space not just for better productivity, but for healthier, more honest work lives.

Sometimes, reclaiming your time isn’t about becoming more efficient. It’s about becoming more you.

The next time you catch yourself deep in an exciting new idea while your inbox overflows, pause and ask: is this my priority – or is it my personality at play?

References

Ashby, F. G., Isen, A. M., & Turken, A. U. (1999). A neuropsychological theory of positive affect and its influence on cognition. Psychological Review, 106(3), 529.

Barrick, M. R., & Mount, M. K. (1991). The Big Five personality dimensions and job performance: A meta-analysis. Personnel Psychology, 44(1), 1–26.

Graziano, W. G., & Eisenberg, N. (1997). Agreeableness: A dimension of personality. In Hogan, R., Johnson, J. & Briggs, S. (Eds.), Handbook of Personality Psychology (pp. 795–824). Academic Press.

McCrae, R. R., & Costa, P. T. (1997). Conceptions and correlates of openness to experience. In Hogan, R., Johnson, J. & Briggs, S. (Eds.), Handbook of Personality Psychology (pp. 825–847). Academic Press.

Sirois, F. M., & Pychyl, T. A. (2013). Procrastination and the priority of short-term mood regulation: Consequences for future self. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 7(2), 115–127.